The Purpose of This Blog

To all of my readers: I apologize if I haven’t made this clear from the get-go. I do tend to get carried away sometimes. But for those who are not completely clear on the purpose of this blog, it is (in no particular order)…

To love and support Bi
Why? Because I want to. Because he makes me want to. Because he’s the most amazing human being I’ve seen in a loooooooooooong time, if not ever. Because he’s severely underrated. Because he needs to know how much he is loved by black women and women of color.

To Ogle Hot Asian Men
Yes, that’s right, to stare at and drool over very attractive, easy-on-the-eyes Asian men. And as you can see by my many posts, there are TONS of them! Just because I like looking at hot Asian men does not mean that I think I have the chance to marry or date them, or even meet them. It doesn’t mean I’m desperate and actually believe that I will settle down with one of them. Get real! I’ve got my sights set on real men, in my surroundings, when it comes to looking for love.

To Discuss AM/BW Relations
Obviously since the name of this blog is “Black Women Love Bi: An Asian Men Appreciation Blog” there will be emphasis put on the interpersonal relationships between the two.

To Emphasize Black Women’s Beauty & Worth, and To Discuss & Examine Their Social Issues
It doesn’t matter if anyone ever concocted a list of 40 reasons why black women are beautiful. I know I am beautiful, as are my sisters, and do not need validation from anyone! HOWEVER, after all the fan-girling and ogling of Asian guys that has been done on this blog, isn’t it quite appropriate that Asian men voice their feelings on our beauty and worth? Once again, I’m not ashamed of that. This blog is about love and appreciation. Black women and Asian men both have to stop apologizing for showing that love to each other. That’s probably where the divide between AM/BW starts: fear of being called desperate or racist. We’ve got to stop it! We’ve got to stop being ashamed and embrace each other and don’t be afraid to admit it to others!

To Express Appreciation For Asian men in General
I refuse to be ashamed of this. I appreciate Asian men and I will let the whole world know. I know tons of Asian men and to me, they are special. No, they are not superior to other men, but I prefer them. I will not talk down or degrade men of other races on this blog. I love all men! But I prefer Asian men. That does not make me or anyone else here desperate.

To have fun!
We can’t take ourselves too seriously here. At the end of the day we all have our own lives, dreams and problems, and BWLB should be a place where we can all come and just laugh and have fun. Why should it be more complicated than that?

40 Reasons Why Black Women Are Beautiful

As much as we love hot and talented Asian men, we’ve got to concentrate on loving ourselves first and foremost. Essence.com was prudent enough to post 40 reasons why we should be proud to be black women (I’ve included the esteemed list in this post below). This is what we need to hear more of. And no doubt, all women are beautiful no matter their color, but it is black women who have been dehumanized the most; and therefore, we need reminders of just how beautiful we are: inside and out.

To the Asian guys reading this: we want to hear more from you, so feel free to tell us how much you love us. Don’t be shy!

40 Reasons Why Black Women Are Beautiful

We are loving and compassionate.
We are the matriarchs of our community.
We are harmonious with the world.
We are powerful beyond measure.
Our voices are melodic, soulful and strong.
We age like no other.
We are dedicated to living a blessed life.
We are resilient.
We can make something out of nothing, with ease.
We have a sense of style and confidence that’s all our own.
We stay fly, whether we’re rocking an afro, a bob, braids, a press n’ curl or a even a close crop.
We have strong muscle structure.
We have kissable lips.
From our cheek and collar bones to the shape of our calves–our contours are distinctive and remarkable.
We are fearless leaders, strong enough to hold the world on our shoulders.
When things are wrong, we do everything in our power to make them right.
We are brilliant and articulate.
We are strong yet feminine.
We play the game to win.
We love hard!
We’re tough, loyal caretakers…naturally maternal.
Our skin looks exquisite in vivid colors.
We’re the fiercest runway walkers.
We are creative.
We are always hopeful.
We’re mentors, ready to guide a young person.
We are driven.
We are creative beyond measure.
We are originators of style and class.
We are down-to-earth.
We are dependable as the sun.
We have the gift of understanding.
We have endurance under pressure.
We are straight-up.
We break barriers every day.
The old saying is true…good black don’t crack!
From Lil Kim to Oprah, we come in a zillion different flavors–and they’re all gorgeous.
We don’t leave the house with crazy hair.
We’ve always rejected “grunge chic” trends going for the fabulous and the glamour.
Our smiles light up the world.

Telisha Shaw: Our Secret

There are some really hateful, mean-spirited people out there, regardless of race and nationality. K-pop fandom is not safe from these people, and lately, with the rumors of love between Telisha Shaw and Junsu of JYJ increasing, these hateful people have really started to come out of the woodworks. Their hatefullness is not just spurned from jealousy, but from racism. For too long, Black women have been considered the lowest of the low, the bottom of the barrel, and the least desirable women in the world. Even our own men seem to not want us sometimes. We all know its not true, but it hurts.

So what happens when a beautiful Black woman comes along, and steals the heart of a non-Black man who is beloved by many women (of all races) in the world? Of course, there will be jealousy; the typical kind between two women that are fighting over the same man. But the jealousy becomes laced with racism, the kind with the underlying concept of “but wait, she’s Black! You’re not supposed to like her because she’s Black! She’s not as good as me because (insert superficial, physical reason based on color or stereotypes here)! I’m better than her!” That is what happens. This beautiful, attractive, smart and totally worthy Black woman becomes reduced to becoming a receptacle of hateful, racist remarks and death threats. Really??? Are we still living in a world like this? Apparently so.

What I like about Telisha is that she is not about to take this lying down. Instead, she’s come up with her own nifty PR, and I couldn’t be more thrilled to share it with all of you in this post. It is her recently released song “Our Secret”, and you are more than willing to come to your own conclusion as to what and whom she is referring to 😉 Some say she’s trolling, others say she’s on to something. You decide!

Thanks to AJ for the vid tip!

A Letter From An Asian Male Reader

Happy Friday to everyone! I hope your week went well, but even if it didn’t, we are right on the cusp of the weekend 🙂

I wanted to share a special email I received from a young Vietnamese man who has frequented my blog and felt the need to express his appreciation for our appreciation of Asian men. So, enjoy! And if you are so moved, please let him know your own thoughts by leaving a comment.

To my Asian male readers: If there are more of you out there, I want you guys speak up and let us know! As you can see from this blog, we have no problem speaking up about you! 🙂

Hi, I wanted to tell you how much I love your blog, thank you so so so so much for showing love for us. I couldn’t comment on your articles on that idiot researcher. Kanazawa is an idiot. I will tell you, as an Asian man (Vietnamese to be more specific), I honestly think that black women are the most beautiful women in the world! I find black women to be so physically attractive, and it doesn’t matter if she’s light-skinned, caramel, or dark-skinned, I find black women of all shades to be beautiful. I also get along with a lot of black girls. My best friends are black girls, and I just click well with them. So I wanted to let you know that Kanazawa does not speak for all of us at all. I, for one, am proud to express how beautiful I think black women are. Unfortunately, not only is there a backlash against Kanazawa (which is justifiable), but against all Asian men (which is not justifiable). People are assuming that he speaks for all Asian men, so they are bashing us along with him.

It really breaks my heart how Asian men and black women share some of the same struggles in society. I understand your perspective on how people try to bring black women down, and it saddens me when people try to portray black women with negative stereotypes when black women are not like that. I also feel the same way about how the media and society negatively portray Asian men. While Asian women are portrayed positively as beautiful and desirable, Asian men are portrayed negatively as dorks and undesirable. Years ago, Bruce Lee became my hero because he defied how Asian men were portrayed in America, and exuded coolness and strength. Yet, society and movies love to show Asian men in a negative way (many movies, including very recent ones, come to mind). Just when I think guys like Bi or the Jabbawockeez or Quest Crew are showing how cool and desirable Asian men can be, society and the media keeps throwing absurd stereotypes and negative portrayals of Asian men in our face. The reason why I’m expressing this to you is, because it saddens me and breaks my heart how negatively portrayed and perceived Asian men are in this country, but seeing your blog brings such a smile to my face, and I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for showing love for us. Hope all is well with you. Take care.

Psychology Today’s Damage Control

Any reasoning person would know that after such an inflammatory article as the one mentioned in one of last week’s posts was published, there would be backlash. Whether by reports on Kanazawa in danger of losing his job and credibility, or Black male journalists coming to our defense, we all knew that this article would get its due attention.

We also knew that there would be damage control. Psychology Today published this article shortly after taking down the infamous one, and although what Nathan Heflick says is nice and all, this question still looms heavily in the air: why couldn’t an article similar to what Heflick wrote have been posted first on the PT website? Why did the first destructive article have to be posted, for PT to post a counter-attack?

Does there need to be a reason why an article on our beauty and grace should be posted? Does there really need to be? Of course not, but the way I see it, this situation is comparable to a four-way stop without a traffic sign. It isn’t until someone dies that the city/government sees the need to put up a traffic light or stop sign. This is, of course, reactive, and not proactive.

So why must there be something negative preceding a positive acknowledgement of black women? There really does seem to be a war against us, doesn’t it? Does it mean that we’re getting closer to where we want to be, and quite frankly, there are people who just don’t want us to get there? If we are already the lowliest of women on this planet, why attack us? Why be threatened? Because the opposite is true…we are threatening. And we are on the rise. What’s more, is that slimy, hateful scum of humanity like Kanazawa and Psychology Today’s editors can’t stop us.

A Few Reasons Why An Asian Guy May Not Approach You

No doubt this isn’t the first time any of us have heard this, but this really helps to put it even more into perspective. In the attached video, the poster points out that the reasons can be different as to why an Asian guy won’t approach you. Of course, as black women, we may automatically think that its because they don’t find us attractive (and sometimes that could surely be the case). However, according to this gentleman’s insight, it is probably and most likely cultural.

‘Beautiful Korean Men’ Is Packin’ Some SERIOUS Hotness

You all may already know about “Beautiful Korean Men”, a Facebook page, but if you don’t, PLEASE go check it out at your earliest convenience. When you need a hot Korean guy fix this is the place to go, but I warn you, you’d better be seated and have an oxygen tank nearby or you WILL lose your breath! Just in case you’re not quite understanding what I’m trying to tell you, please see the sample photos below that BKM regularly posts.

P.S. – All well and good concerning preferences, but whoever thinks Asian guys aren’t sexy are OUT-OF-THEIR-COTTON-PICKIN-MINDS!!!

An Ignorant Man

Speaking of unattractiveness (see image below), evolutionary psychologist Satoshi Kanazawa served me a dose of reality in Psychology Today’s article posted yesterday entitled “Why Are Black Women Less Physically Attractive Than Other Women?” (the original article has since been removed from the website). Well, a dose of reality can be a good thing…it can be a wake up call!

True, I have been doused in the notion that all Asian men should love Black women and vice versa, but as you can see by the ignorance and straight up racism of this article, it is just not always true. But, seriously?? I get the feeling that the next article Kanazawa posts will be entitled “Why Do Black Women Have Tails and Women of Other Races Do Not?” I mean, this is some really throwin-it-back-to-the-days-of-jim-crow itsh. You know those days! When good law-abiding ‘Christian’ folks tried to prove by use of the Holy Bible that blacks were lower than animals because they were descended from Ham. It was really hard for me to believe that this article was recently written, and even more shocking, published! Well, actually, the most disappointing aspect of this article is that an Asian man wrote it. He should know better than anyone what it is like to be stereotyped and blacklisted. I also find it interesting that this article was printed at a time like this, when the AM/BW movement is strong, growing and moving ever ahead.

Forget Kanazawa san…but rather, what is Psychology Today really trying to tell us?

Bi Wants To Meet the World’s 2 Most Powerful Black Women

Actually, they are the 2 most powerful women—period. Regardless of their race. Oh I so hope he gets to meet Oprah and Michelle Obama one day!!

A few weeks ago when Bi traveled to NYC from South Korea to attend the Time 100 Gala, he was asked by fans who else on the Most Influential list he was most looking forward to meeting. After answering that he’d most like to meet President Obama, he then added that he also wanted to meet Oprah Winfrey. After the gala ended, he commented that contrary to expectations, the First Lady had not attended the highly esteemed event. One couldn’t help but notice the disappointment in his voice and facial expression.

Its not hard to understand why Bi would want to meet such powerful women—who wouldn’t? But for Bi, I believe it goes deeper. Wouldn’t you agree that its about the ‘kinship-in-struggle’ he no doubt feels with these amazing women? Isn’t it a fact that all 3 of these people were born either poor or under-privileged, and faced seemingly insurmountable obstacles because of their racial, gender or social class, but came out on top and victorious?

I believe that Bi is attracted to people who’s ‘rags-to-riches’ stories are similar to his own. He once stated (in so many words) that he doesn’t care for people who were born with a silver spoon in their mouths. Some might take offense to this statement, but I understand where he’s coming from. Isn’t it true that some people never have to work for a thing in their lives, and for that reason, do not know the real value of hard work and determination. These people give up at the first hint of a test, and in affect, are not able to tap into their true and highest potential. But rather, they drift aimlessly in life, receiving hand-outs and perks that they don’t really deserve. Not the case with Oprah, the First Lady, and our Bi.

No doubt, this nation has come leaps and bounds from the days of slavery and civil rights, but it is probably most difficult to be both black and a woman in this world. Although he has yet to say, I do believe that Bi has taken note of this very thing, and I would go so far as to say that he’s probably inspired by our resilience and strength. After all, he can very much relate.