As much as we love hot and talented Asian men, we’ve got to concentrate on loving ourselves first and foremost. Essence.com was prudent enough to post 40 reasons why we should be proud to be black women (I’ve included the esteemed list in this post below). This is what we need to hear more of. And no doubt, all women are beautiful no matter their color, but it is black women who have been dehumanized the most; and therefore, we need reminders of just how beautiful we are: inside and out.
To the Asian guys reading this: we want to hear more from you, so feel free to tell us how much you love us. Don’t be shy!
40 Reasons Why Black Women Are Beautiful
We are loving and compassionate.
We are the matriarchs of our community.
We are harmonious with the world.
We are powerful beyond measure.
Our voices are melodic, soulful and strong.
We age like no other.
We are dedicated to living a blessed life.
We are resilient.
We can make something out of nothing, with ease.
We have a sense of style and confidence that’s all our own.
We stay fly, whether we’re rocking an afro, a bob, braids, a press n’ curl or a even a close crop.
We have strong muscle structure.
We have kissable lips.
From our cheek and collar bones to the shape of our calves–our contours are distinctive and remarkable.
We are fearless leaders, strong enough to hold the world on our shoulders.
When things are wrong, we do everything in our power to make them right.
We are brilliant and articulate.
We are strong yet feminine.
We play the game to win.
We love hard!
We’re tough, loyal caretakers…naturally maternal.
Our skin looks exquisite in vivid colors.
We’re the fiercest runway walkers.
We are creative.
We are always hopeful.
We’re mentors, ready to guide a young person.
We are driven.
We are creative beyond measure.
We are originators of style and class.
We are down-to-earth.
We are dependable as the sun.
We have the gift of understanding.
We have endurance under pressure.
We are straight-up.
We break barriers every day.
The old saying is true…good black don’t crack!
From Lil Kim to Oprah, we come in a zillion different flavors–and they’re all gorgeous.
We don’t leave the house with crazy hair.
We’ve always rejected “grunge chic” trends going for the fabulous and the glamour.
Our smiles light up the world.
Black Women Love 비 
Wow I couldn’t say better and as an 23 years young asian guy who was born and growing up in Europe I just agree with these things you wrote up. And I wanted to say as the guy on other post-video said when he going to a bar or club he just zoom in black women, that’s true! I mean that’s what i feel and always felt. When I’m going out the first women I see is Black women, it doesn’t matter if she’s 18 or 40, they’re still looking attractiv to me and to many other asian guys round the world.
Peace and love, Asian Men & Black women United ❤
By The Way, I'm a new reader of this great blog from Europe and I will always coming for visit.
you are a good man.
You are a good man,
and all of 23 years old.
there is hope for the future after all!
We are ALL THAT and then some…….(SMILES). I’m all of 5′ and half feet tall, but I think my shoulders just got a little bit taller! Thank you BOAB81 and thank you Essence for recognizing the beauty and Strength that is the Black woman.
To Ali/Akira, welcome and I personally appreciate your comment. Please don’t hesitate to come back and talk to us. We love the input from our Asian admirers….(SMILES)
But I do have to say…..W-e-e-ell, now some of us Do leave home with crazy hair, myself included (*Kekekeke*). I’ve seen some “Do’s” that made me have to slam on brakes to keep from ramming the car in front of me cause I found myself staring at….”Gawd” I don’t know what….BUT HEY, that’s what makes us unique, huh?……..(BIG SMILES)
ha!
i was going to say something about that crazy hair business too!
now there is crazy cool,
and then there’s just plain crazy.
i envy those with crazy cool hair.
i have fine, medium length hair
which i usually pin up
all kinda victorian-age like.
people get on me to wear it down.
but when i wear it down
and that houston humidity hits it…
there is absolutely nothing
crazy cool about my hair at all,
it just looks plain crazy!
thank you boab for sharing this positive piece with us.
in light of Juneteenth coming up here in Texas,
it’s actually quite timely.
BiAlamode I was just getting ready to post that “We don’t leave the house with crazy hair.” aint always the truth.
and ali/akira tell your friends to stop by as well. We would def enjoy your input
Awwww,
someone wrote a poem all about me…
but seriously,
as black women of any and every background,
it is our life experience,
both the negative and the positive,
that has shaped us.
we are who we are,
because of who and what we are;
and i honestly,
would not have it any other way.
i strive each and every day
to present myself in such a way
that would make my people proud.
i have never wanted to be
anyone other than myself,
and i am proud to be included among
a most extraordinary group of people.
I xompletly agree, although i may lack some, lol but not all. I do see this in lots o f Black women and and just hope Asian men see the same, hopefully. But thank you for posting these up as i guess a reminder, and ow i can say i actually value those traits in me. Hehe :))
OMG! I think I’m gonna cry lol lol……I think we should all read this to our black daughters that are groing up in this world where beauty is defind by being white tall and size 0
OUPS!!! sorry I replyed to fast, forgive me if I made any spelling mistakes (I’m french canadian! lol lol) I’ll take my time next time lol lol
Thanks and keep up the good work 🙂
Carine
oh, and yes,
we do love hard,
real hard,
sometimes to fault
in that at times it is not reciprocated.
but when you find someone
who loves you, appreciates you, and supports you
just as much, if not more in return…
it’s magical.
Ladies, I am a forty-something year old mother, no offense but it sounds to me like you ladies are desperate and crying out for the attention of the Asian men. If a asian man is attracted to you it’s because he likes what he sees physically or your personality. You should not seek validation from them by posting a list of reasons why Black Women are Beautiful. I think the list was published for us as an empowerment for our black women. So ladies, either the asian men are attracted to you or they’re not. Maybe you should have simply made the post “Beautiful Black Woman and the Asian Men who loves them…”
I do enjoy reading your blog…but as a mature woman and someone engaged to a Korean man, I just felt the need to keep it real with you ladies (smile)
Ali/Akira – Kudos to you for your honest assessment of what you see in black women!!
@niecy: thanks for your comment! No offense taken! But I must say that although it may seem that I am desperate, that’s the last thing i am, but i do want the attention of an asian man. It seems to me that many black women are embarrassed to admit that asian men are their preference, but i am not! I think black women are beautiful and i wanted to share that with my readers. And since this is an asian men appreciation blog, it is only appropriate that asian men sound out about their love for us. So, no desperation here! Just mutual love 🙂
@Niecy,
I am a 40 something Black woman who is married to a 40 something beautiful Black man. As BOAB81 has stated and I reiterate, there is absolutely no desperation on my part and never has been. I am just one individual who has come to appreciate the beauty that is also in the AM/BW relationship. I do find Asian men attractive and make no bones about it. But, I know who has my heart and he’s by my side everyday. However, I feel a sisterhood with the ladies on this blog and whatever their relationships and with whomever they are with, be they Asian men or not, we all come together with the same purpose when we visit this site and that’s to do what it says…………Appreciate the Asian Man, Bi especially. I believe the ladies on this blog to be a very “got it together” group of ladies and I have never felt desperation coming from anyone, just genuine heart felt, admiration and respect of Asian men and the cultures they come from.
Ahh BiAlamode! That was so sweet. I feel the same way about the “girls” on this site.
while your comments
are absolutely appreciated and welcome here,
there are absolutely no feelings of desperation whatsoever
expressed any where here on my part,
nor have i sensed any on the parts of others
actively participating on this site.
i must say though, that i am somewhat offended
that you see us in such a light.
the more i think about it,
not only do i find your comments offensive,
but they are simply so far from the truth.
this is an asian appreciation forum.
there is no exclusivity involved here; nor
are we looking to hook-up with asian men via this blog.
for as long as i have been participating in this blog,
“desperation” has not once entered my mind,
though we have discussed acts of desperation on the part of others…
there is fun to be had here by women of all colors,
and 99.9 percent of us appear to be very much rooted in reality.
with you being a black women engaged to a korean man,
i am somewhat annoyed that you
would come here, and in a sense,
ruin the fun for the rest of us;
flaunting the fact that you got yours,
assuming we want exactly what you got;
insinuating that we are never going to get it;
alluding to our inability to accept that fact;
thus resulting in our supposed desperate need for validation.
you stated, “if a asian man is attracted to you,
it’s because he likes what he sees physically or your personality.”
well, I should certainly hope so!
while we here may share in each other’s fantasies,
race, creed and/or color aside,
what we all want is something very real,
and some of us already have that something very real.
would not the same hold true in return?
as for this particular article,
i believe the host to be very much aware that her participants are
mostly women of color in some form or fashion, or in their entirety.
articles such as this, as well as those preceding it
are presented as food for thought.
in light of earlier posts,
indeed, this article is in keeping with
an underlying thread regarding the core nature of this site.
i submit to you, that a little affirmation
every now and then certainly can’t hurt.
however, i honestly cannot see a relationship
between the posting of the article above,
and expressed acts of desperation
on the part of the participants of this blog.
you, being a women of color engaged to a korean man,
i am curious as to why you would begrudge us
the opportunity to consider a like possibility;
again i see not the connection here between an article espousing
the qualities of beautiful black women,
and acts of desperation.
while there is much commentary here of an immature nature,
in all honesty, much of it i must lay claim to;
as such, it is very much all in good fun.
there is also plenty of commentary
of a more serious nature,
for which we comment accordingly,
but none of us takes ourselves too seriously,
and I believe all here are like-minded and intelligent enough to know
that desperation is no means to an end.
i must say, desperation has neither been expressed
nor existed in our vocabulary
until you introduced it here just now.
i am curious, are there elements of desperation in your life,
that would lead you to believe this to be the case in ours…
Thank you so much for posting this. Truly, I mean this post couldn’t have come at a better time. There is so much negativity towards us that everyone tends to overlook it by stating well everyone woman of every race is like that. When I hear people say that I’m thinking to myself show me the facts. In honesty that may be true, but we’re the ones that are truly dehumanized while every other race of women is placed on this almighty altar. I’m so happy that this was posted. Thank you. Hell there’s not enough thank yous in the world. Haha But seriously this touched me so much, I say this because I’ve had personal experience by everyone saying that black women aren’t this and that . Black men truly are the ones screwing us over and it travels to other races of people. If Black guys dehumanize us then other people of other races believe it is okay to do so. This really, helped me out and I truly believe Black women everywhere should read this post and make sure they instill strong love in their daughters as well.
@Sasha,
I understand how you feel and this positive affirmation for Black women comes at a time when some would think it’s ok to degrade us. While I do feel that some Black men may, as you say, “screw us over” I can’t say all Black men do that. I will assume that you are just making a generalization, but I had to speak on that point in particular, as I am married to a Black man. While I know this is a site that is for the appreciation of the Asian man, I can’t let the Brothas (all) be put in a negative light either. My husband has been nothing short of a true blessing in my life and has been as true as any flesh and blood human being can be. No, I won’t pretend he is perfect, nor am I, as we have had our ups and downs like any other passionate couple out there. However, I can say with conviction that he has never “screwed me over”, “raked me over the coals” and any other colloquialism that can be stated and if there were EVER signs of trouble brewing, me and all of my 5 and half feet SHUT IT DOWN…..with a quickness!! The bottom line is we get each other, we know each other, we respect each other, we love each other.
My reason for responding to your post, IS NOT to brag or throw what I feel is my good fortune in anyone’s face, or to make you or anyone feel bad, but only to let it be known that BELIEVE IT OR NOT there are good Black men out in the world Still. Even though I agree, they are a precious few……can’t pretend it’s not an issue. While I come to this blog, most definitely, to appreciate the Asian man and all his glory, I can’t let people who live in other countries and read this blog also, think that ALL Black men are unworthy or lacking because it is simply not true. I live with that truth, not just from the perspective of being married to a Black man, but I include my father, my grandfathers, my great-grandfather and also my uncles in the total picture that is my life, as well.
All that being said, I think we can wholeheartedly appreciate the Asian man, but Not at the expense of Black men Who Are Indeed taking care of and holding their own. I hope my words do not offend, but offer a differing perspective as they were meant too…………..
No, i’m not offended. It was meant to be a generalization because your experience is completely different from mine and I what I went/ go through. Most Black men I have met and or encountered have been down right cruel in the things they say about us. Although I will agree with you on that there are some good black men out there. I never meant to offend, I just shared my experience because I have witnessed this a majority of the time. So other people who read this I just want to say I didn’t mean all black men do this. So again, sorry if I offended anyone by my post. Please try and understand where I’m coming from. That’s all. 🙂
Sasha,
It’s all good and I Do get it……………(SMILES)
The poet piece that came from ESSENCE magazine and What The Frell pretty much summed up why Black women shouldn’t be ashamed of who they are.Ali, also welcome to the club.
Thank you, What The Frell…thank you thank you thank you for saying with elegence and classic what I wanted to say, but didn’t know how to put into those words! So I say thank you!
I have only been at the blog for awhile and I think Niecy’s comments are the first to be ugly towards this blog that, in my opinion, is helping to “bridge the gap” between Asian Men/Black Women.
As a black woman who has dated Asian men before I can say with 100% certainty that I have NEVER been desparate for the attention of the men I dated, nor any man for that matter! I know when I was younger (in my teens and twenties) I probably did act a little ditzy to get a guys attention, but those years are long gone. As I’m sure it’s the same for some of the women who frequent this blog, we’ve all been there, done that. So us showing our appreciation and attraction to (Bi) Rain (a Korean man) is another extention of who we are as Black Women and that’s what makes us so very UNIQUE!
So very well said. I completely agree with everything
I love coming to the blog, the ladies here always keep it classy and elegant. Thank you BOAB81 for posting this, and thank you Whatthefrell and fellow BWLB members for those thoughtful words and insight. God Bless!!!